Of Him and Her
by Goddess247
Summary: You woudn't think that's how it all started between them... DeclanZhen Pre and Post MI:3.
1. Of the Beginning

Of Him and Her

Prologue: Of the Beginning

He felt her. Literally. Fragile, gentle, soft. Passionate, aggressive, fervent. He felt her skin on his and it was driving him crazy.

He knew he shouldn't be feeling this. It was a hundred percent wrong to say the least. But as her lips trailed their way along his collarbone his better judgment flew out of the window.

"Wait…" He muttered but her lips were on his that same second. "What…"

What's her name? Yeah, he wanted to ask but next moment he was lost. Lost in her embrace, her coffee-brown eyes that were fogged with fervor, excitement, lost in the heat of their bodies…

After that it never mattered what her name was. Left in his mind was an image of perfection: a slender Asian woman with hair black as raven's wings and unforgettable dark eyes.

In reality when Declan woke up the next morning in a cheap motel room of some unkempt place to stay in west Tokyo he learned that his dreams wasn't the only thing the stranger captured. The disk. The disk with the information on the latest and his first MIF operation…


	2. Of a Personal Thing

Of Him and Her

Chapter 1 – Of a Personal Thing

_Three years later…_

"Wake up, Sleeping Beauty, we've got a briefing to do." Luther's voice sliced through the silence of the room where Declan was somewhere near sleeping, head in his hands on the table.

"I'm up!" He jerked instantly.

"Rough night?"

"Don't ask…" The Irishman rubbed his temples slowly, trying to fix the increasing headache.

"Fine, I won't." The dark-skinned man made it to his place on the opposite side of the table.

"So, where's Ethan?" Declan sat back in the chair.

"He's already been through all the details. We're waiting for one more agent and we can start. She's getting her MIF ID…"

"The new one?"

"Yeah. Well, I wouldn't say that although." Luther picked the file from the other table behind him and passed it to the operative in front of him. "See for yourself."

"Not bad. One year Siberian's…" He announced, turning the pages. "Field job right after the training…three years in CSF. What the hell is that?"

"Chinese Special Force." But that was not Luther's voice. Honey, almost inaudible voice purred at the door.

"Oh, you showed up. Welcome to the MI Force." Luther stood up; Declan only seconds later with his jaw dropped, and starched a hand.

"Thanks. Lei Zhen." She shook Luther's hand and then turned to Declan but her face dropped as soon as she saw her face…for so much as a split second.

"Hi." The Irishman muttered finally and extended a hand as well. "Declan Gormley."

The Asian shook his hand but the whole scene didn't go unnoticed by Luther who was positioned at the head of the table by now:

"Have a sit. Let's start, we don't have all day."

As both of them sat on the opposite sides of a solid table the screens came from the ceiling and the picture of grey-haired man in his late forties came up on the them.

"Meet Joseph Everett Parker, our client. He seems to be a perfect citizen, head of the family. He walks his dog in the morning, reads everyday paper during his caffeine doze…" Luther said monotonally.

"Playing happy family?" Declan cut it, Zhen's eyes shooting up at Luther.

"Exactly." The older man answered. "But nothing's as it seems to be. Parker is drug-diller and his drugs are popular more then in nine countries."

"Isn't he a wanted man then?" Zhen inquired.

"Oh, the government wishes he was." Luther nodded in reply. "But unfortunately he was never nailed."

"So, what's our mission?" The Irishman asked, switching his gaze from the screen to his boss.

"Our mission, if you choose to accept it, is to kill Parker and get all the information from the main computer in his office. Ethan is going to be a hit man, Declan – transportation, Zhen you get the files, I'll take the weapon."

"Time limits?" The woman looked from the file on her lap.

"The mission will take place tomorrow evening at nine. You have to be here at half past seven sharp. Any questions?"

The other two operatives shook their heads 'no'.

"Good, then see you tomorrow. Don't be late." Luther stood up and next moment disappeared through the sliding glass door.

As the silence in the room got more pressing Zhen too stood up to take off when a voice with a thick accent spoke:

"You remember me, don't you?"

She froze and then turned, her face showing no emotions:

"Yes."

"So, I was you mission?" This realization was heavy on his heart that morning three years ago; it seemed that now it came rushing back.

She closed her brown orbs for a split second then, looking straight into his cobalt ones, said:

"It was my job. Nothing personal."

She headed for the exit as soon as the words escaped her mouth.

Just a job…

Was it true?

Nothing personal…

Declan knew one thing for sure, he had to bury all possible emotions and feelings he was experiencing deep down because he wasn't that naïve new guy from three years ago who just got his first mission, he now was a professional.

Nothing personal…

The only thing that bothered him was the question of how much more time will her words sound in his head.

Nothing personal…

----------

Hey, guys! Sorry, it happened like that with this chapter. I had no time and asked my baby-sis (ok, maybe not so baby, she's 11) to download the chapter and she used the one that wasn't supposed to come out (with the mistakes and all), like the sketch. So, there you go…the real one's up.

And thanks to everyone who reads it and if you do, don't forget to click a small button on the left (down…down…there!) of the screen and write what you think about it to me!

Yours,

Goddess 247

xxx


	3. Of Her Thoughts

Of Him and Her

Chapter 2 – Of her Thoughts

As she was making her way out of the briefing room, leaving him behind to stare at her disappearing form, her face was emotionless. Although it was still, she did remember him well. He was her first assignment.

She remembered that day as if it was yesterday. Remembered how her former boss, Jin Tanake, opened the door to a small office on the eighteenth floor of the CSF-building and announced that she was finally added to a field job unit and her first mission was to get the disk from one of the American operatives.

The plan slowly formed in her mind, all the details left behind. According to that plan she wasn't suppose to end up in one bed with the American agent. She just had to add lots of luminal, a strong drug addition made specially for the poor guy to fall asleep in two or three minutes, and get the disk. But…

There was something in the way he looked at her, his crystal-blue eyes searching hers, looking right through her, making the shivers ran down her back, and she went too far…

Yes, at the end of the day she was the winner, well…at least she got the disk. The winner part though was questionable. But she did her job. That was all that mattered.

…Right?

"Sorry." Zhen suddenly heard from afar and, switching back to reality, realized that she's just bumped into someone, or that someone bumped into her for that matter.

"It's ok." She answered. He was not tall, grayish blue eyes, dark hair, pleasant smile. Yeah, descriptions like that came with the job. She couldn't grade people other way anymore. Only the standards: height, color of hair and eyes. But then again smile was her own little addition to that list.

"You sure? You looked a bit into yourself back there…" He smiled again, showing his snow-white teeth.

"Was just trying to answer some rhetorical questions." She herself offered a small smile.

"Aren't those better of as they are?"

"You mean unanswered?"

"Exactly." He put the glasses in his hand on the top of his head before extending a hand for her to shake. "Ethan Hunt."

She took it, "Lei Zhen."

"New here?" The man who's just introduced himself as Ethan asked.

"Yeah, first day." She responded as they both started walking in the way of the elevator.

"If you want I can show you around." Ethan suggested.

"A star agent as a guide?" She chuckled and he let another smile on his face. "Sure."

"Ok, but first a coffee. I owe you this much for almost sweeping you off your feet." He pressed the button. "By the way, how did you know I was the…how did you put it…star agent?"

"Hmm…the rumor has it…" She smiled slyly as the sliding doors closed.

The only thing neither of them noticed was a pair of cobalt eyes, cold as ice, following then till the shutting of the steel doors.

…Right?


	4. Of their First Mission

Of Him and Her

Chapter 3 – Of their First Mission

The hospital bed of the med lab was cold to say the least. Bleak, forlorn, unwelcoming… Her hand was being treated by some doctors she didn't know. It wasn't really serious, just a regular shot, a cut, but, of course, it was insisted that she went through all the formal med crap.

"You did great." Ethan cheered her from his place on the other bed where the nurse was putting antibiotics on his bloody shoulder.

"You too." Zhen gave him a reassuring smile. "Not so bad for the first mission together, don't you think?"

He nodded right before another medication was injected into his body that made the strong-willed man greet his teeth.

Thinking back on what's happened Zhen knew there were some mistakes but they did a good job…whatever Brussel would say or yell for that matter…

"The target is taken care of. I'm coming out. Time – two minutes." Ethan's voice sounded in the other three agents' heads.

"Wait. Mongoose's got problems. Nine militaries on her level. The files are almost done but you take care of them." Luther said, pushing buttons on the keypad.

"Coming." Was his short reply.

"Phoenix, car's ready?" Zhen whispered, preparing to leave Parker's office, cool, collected, exterior but heart's beating at rapid rate.

"Already here." Declan responded.

"We have a problem." Ethan announced, getting shot by one of the guards. "Too many of them. Mongoose, get ready to fly."

"What?" Zhen's confused reply followed just as Hunt quickly burst into the office and started tiring a special rope firmly to one of the windows. "Oh, no…"

But too late. He's already grabbed her by the waist and a moment later they were falling, soaring through the sky. Just like birds except for the lack of feathered wings…

"Shit, I see you…" The car started as the words left the Irishman's mouth.

"Hey!" Luther's head popped through the hospital's door. "You two ok?"

"Fine."

"Good."

"Ok, Brussel wants us all in his office in twenty minutes. You up for it?" The Afro-American smirked.

Ethan produced a chuckle while Zhen grinned but the smile slide of her face as a sharp shot of pain sliced through her hand with another strain of blood.

Meanwhile Declan was fighting his own demons, coming up to Benjy's table:

"Hey, man. You found what I asked?"

"Hi. Yeah, but you know it's wrong, if you let me say so. We shouldn't pry into the life of the other operatives…"

"Don't give me that." Interrupted the younger man. "I have reasons so just let me read it."

"Fine, man. But…just think about it once more." As the computer genies left the chair in front of the computer, Declan took over it, clicking the latest opened file on the screen.

The picture of a beautiful Asian woman with long black curls showed up on it a second later. The profile, Not the usual one that everyone can read but an 'intensive research' as Benjy called it, done by trained hackers.

There was no doubt that what he was doing was wrong, amiss, even immoral, but he had to know or he wouldn't be able to sleep at night. Who was he kidding he wouldn't be able to sleep anyway…anymore.

As he was getting in the history of the slender Asian agent, his eyes were getting wider with every passing second. How could that be? Was it all true? He's heard about women like her but never could he ever imagine he'll meet someone her kind…

Somewhere in a distance he heard a harsh strong voice calling his name but it took him another couple seconds to tear the eyes away from the computer:

"Yeah?"

"I've been calling you for the last five minutes." Luther gruffed. "What's that you're reading?"

"Jokes from the internet." Lame. Really lame.

"Ok." The older man said, eyebrows raised. "If you say so. Brussel's office, fifteen minutes."

Declan nodded and faced the screen once again, this time a wave of shock not making it's way there, his eyes suddenly changing to navy blue.

If what was in front of his eyes was true then probably she'd said the truth. He was just a job…not that it mattered now, that they were partners, worked together, were fellow agents…

Together…worked together…


	5. Of the Apology

Of Him and Her

Chapter 4 – Of the Apology

A month after the core team of the MIF was formed Ethan was ordered to train a new agent. The "green" girl who seemed to be too young, innocent for the job. But everyone knew what they were getting themselves into started working for an organization like that. If it's a wrong choice they have no one to blame but themselves.

Lindsay Farris. Lindsay. Ethan told the three of his teammates that she was one of the best from all the agents he had trained. It impressed, amazed even. Especially Luther. He better of all knew that Mr. Hunt almost never expressed admiration for any of his so-called students.

"Hi." Declan turned from the screen of his laptop to see an unfamiliar face.

"Hello."

"You're Declan, right?" A pretty young woman with light shoulder-length hair and dark eyes stepped a bit more closer.

"Yes." The Irishman nodded. "Funny thing, you know my name, I don't know yours."

"Lindsay." She smiled sweetly, extending a hand for him to shake but instead he planted a kiss on it. "Oh, a gentleman. Nice."

"Can I help you with something?" He positioned himself in the chair again.

"Yeah, Ethan said you could give me files with reports on your latest missions." Lindsay requested.

"Sure. You need then on the screen or on paper?"

"Whatever's easier for you." She beamed.

From the corner of her eye Zhen could follow the scene in the next room. The glass walls were see-through after all. This woman, Lindsay Farris, what was she actually doing there, speaking, flirting with Gormley for God's sake! She was supposed to be working…but it's not like it was any of her business. She was just doing some reading on their next mission that's about to take place in two days.

Reading, reading, processing the information, making conclusions. The Asian caught herself on a thought that she became too much like a robot, a machine. A machine that does its job properly, without even a sign of a mistake. But Zhen couldn't help but wonder if that was worth it.

Declan stayed at the office late that night, working, searching for some files he's lost, when he heard a soft knocking and turned to see Zhen behind the easily-shattered transparent substance, shifting on her feet unsure.

"Come in." He called out, still going through the papers.

She entered, gracefully but hesitantly making her way to stand by the table, where Declan located himself under the pile of work.

"Hey." Zhen said quietly.

"Hi, you need something?" He replied, not looking up from the piece of information.

"I…" She started, uncertain, as if not really sure what to say. "I wanted to talk to you."

"Ok." Declan nodded, eyes fixed on the papers.

There was a long moment of silence before the next words escaped the woman's mouth:

"I'm sorry."

"What?" At this Declan finally looked up not to sure what to think.

"For what it's worth…" She repeated. Looking him in the eye. "I'm sorry."

With that said Zhen turned and headed for the door, leaving the Irishman stunned, his jaw slightly hanging.

"Are you…" He finally coughed out, making her stop at the door. "Are you sorry for that night?"

The young woman turned, waving her black hair.

"No." She shook her head slightly. "I'm sorry I failed your mission."

This time she left. But this time Declan wasn't just shocked, he was stunned or, to be fully honest, paralyzed with the unexpected revelation.


	6. Of their Capture

Of Him and Her

Chapter 5 – Of their Capture

"Whom do you work for?" A giant Latino-looking man with a scar through the right half of his hideous face asked, taking a seat in front of her on a stool.

"I work in advertisement." She answered, trying to untie her hands behind her back.

"Whom do you work for?" The man asked again.

"I already told you." Zhen replied, calm, her face still, eyes emotionless.

"And I didn't believe you." He stood up and made his way closer to the Asian woman in a long silk black dress with her haired joined up. "You'd better tell me the truth, Asian Barbie, or I'm gonner make it very painful for you."

She looked up right into his eyes, never fixing her gaze on a marked skin:

"I told you everything."

He stared back, not blinking:

"Jose!"

Another man looked up from the place behind the door where he was standing all through the conversation.

"Get the tools."

Zhen's eyes flicked for a split second right at the moment the man that only minutes ago was introduced as Jose stepped back into the dark room with a black box in his hands.

Yes…the mission didn't go exactly as they planned…

He was restless. And it wasn't because of a cold dark cell that surrounded him with its wet walls covered with now creamy dust. It was because the terrorists that they were supposed to get the information from took her more then an hour ago. Knowing how cruel, brutal the Latinos are, an hour is a lot…

When Declan's thoughts once again trailed to his partner, the steel door opened and bruised Zhen with bloody bottom lip and an eye was thrown in, dress torn and no shoos on.

"Zhen…" Declan fell on his knees, taking a hold of young woman completely covered with blood.

"Ah…" A whisper of pain. "Careful…"

It was only then that the Irishman acknowledged the probably cracked ribs.

"Damn…" He muttered, helping the bruised agent, carrying her to the wall.

Minutes later he was sitting on a stone floor, his back to the wall, head titled.

"When we get out of hear, I promise those brats are going to get what they deserve." Declan said quietly, looking down, her head peacefully on his lap.

She chuckled, although it was obvious that the movement was painful for her.

"If…" She coughed with blood, spilling on her cheek. "You mean, if we get out…"

"No, I mean when…" He repeated, brushing the blood away with his palm.

Time. It's such a questionable category. For some time passes slowly. For others it's never enough. For Zhen it felt like time didn't exist at all.

A gentle movement brought her back to reality. She looked up yet again to see Declan subconsciously stroke her raven hair. And although they were in a stone cage somewhere in the west Porto-Rico with a little chance for rescue, she felt better, she felt at ease.

He felt her tense and looked down to see her try to change into a sitting position. He reached his hand to help her up. And she did sit, coping his position, but that followed with another explosion of blood from her mouth.

"Shit…" She whispered, removing it with her trembling hand.

"Let me see your ribs." Declan said, positioning himself in front of her.

Zhen nodded, letting him feel the cracked ribs under the material, making a sound that indicated the sore parts.

"Never…ah…thought it's gonna end up like that…" Zhen murmured, her eyes getting even more fogged with every second.

"No, no." Declan sat back next to her, putting a hand on her face, cupping her cheek. "it's not the end. Luther and Ethan will break us out of here."

"Why are you doing this?" She asked, her voice shaking.

"Doing what?" His Irish accent thick.

"Comforting me…being like this…" Zhen responded, weak.

"I don't know." He lied, even though he understood she knew that, caressing her cheek all the while.

"You do…" Another whisper.

His breath was hot on her lips. Only an inch apart.

They both stopped as all of a sudden the iron door opened to reveal the same man that "talked" to the Asian only a couple hours ago.

"Take him." He ordered with the harsh voice of his to the two men behind him.

As Declan was pulled away from her and taken in the other direction, Zhen felt as if a peace of her heart was ripped away as well. She heard her own feeble, frail voice from afar, whispering something among the lines of 'no, don't', but then she sink into the welcoming arms of unconsciousness, plain and simple…


	7. Of their Refuges

Of Him and Her

Chapter 6 – Of their Refuges

"Is this because we've got captured once in a lifetime?" Declan made a face, throwing documents on his desk.

"Pretty much." Ethan answered, smiling slyly.

"Oh, crap…" The Irishman stopped instantly, grabbing the handle of the chair for support.

"Man, you ok?" The other agent was fast by his Declan's side.

"Just my shoulder…" He pointed his left one that was broken. "Hurts like hell."

"Yeah, I know." Ethan nodded. "Those are the worst bones to break."

Declan made his way to the chair to sit, a motion that cursed as much pain as any other.

"He thinks they've broken us, doesn't he?" He asked after a moment, eyes boring the ones of Ethan.

The agent looked away.

"What do you think?"

"If you say you didn't then I believe you. Hell, I trust you with my life! But you have to get into Brussel's shoos: you've been kept imprisoned, they've injected you with different kinds of poison, there was even found the scorpion one in Zhen's blood, they beat you…maybe you did spill something subconsciously…"

"What?" Declan jumped from his place, hurt expression clearly across his face. "I know the rules crystally! You've slipped, your fault. Shut your mouth and stay that way till you're saved or killed."

"Hey! I'm on your side." The other agent looked up to meet a very sharp gaze. "I know you didn't. And I know she didn't either."

Another moment of silence.

"Emm…Have you seen Zhen yet?" He asked finally.

"Yeah." The fellow agent nodded. "Haven't you."

"No, not yet." The Irishman responded, looking at the table, suddenly finding it more interesting to look at, a movement noticed by the star-agent.

"Luther's with her now." He announced and, patting Declan on his healthy shoulder slightly, left the room.

The woman in the question opened her eyes slightly, adjusting to the sun light behind the window.

"Hey, girl, how do you feel?" She turned her head a bit Luther's concerned face let a small smile.

"Hey…" She responded weakly. "I'm fine. Or will be for that matter."

"Good. Cause Brussel's got a hell coming your direction." The dark-skinned agent chuckled at his own joke while Zhen produced only a tired smile.

"How's Declan?"

"He's ok. Couple broken bones, he'll live." Luther answered, taking a seat closer to her bed.

"Luther, can I ask you something?" She looked up, her eyes revealing no emotions.

"Shoot."

"What do you think of the relationships between agents?"

Luther knew why she asked him. She saw him sense there was something more between the two young agents then just their work. She knew. So he sighed and gave her a straight answer. Maybe not the one she wanted to hear but the one that was needed to be given:

"I think they should be strictly professional. Any emotion involved and you're burned. So is the one you're having those relationships with."

Zhen nodded, her eyes still emptiness.

"Why, you know someone who has it?" Luther decided to play along to give her an impression as if nothing happened. But in reality all he wanted to say was that what they were talking about would never leave the room.

She smiled again, a sad one now, indicating that she appreciated his intentions.

The male agent took her hand in his and squeezed it lightly to reassure her that even if it's not going to be all right, it will get better…

But will it really?


	8. Of the Unfaithfulness

Of Him and Her

Chapter 7 – Of the Unfaithfulness

_And it kills him inside  _

_To know that I am happy  _

_With some other guy  _

_I can see him dying  _

"Ethan, are you sure?" But Zhen already knew the answer.

"Yes." He nodded, proving her right. "You should know I am."

"I don't understand you." Declan cut in from his seat in the far corner of the room. "You better of all know that an agent can't have a normal family!"

"That's exactly why I'm leaving the field job."

"But what about you career, man?" Luther came closer to look straight at his long-time partner. "Have you forgotten all the things you've been through to get what you have now?"

Ethan kept saying his explanations, even excuses sometimes, but Zhen caught herself not listening anymore. What scared her the most was not that her friend was leaving them but that for what he was leaving, abandoning them. For love, family, normal life. Would she be able to do this someday? And if no? Would she be a slave of her own job for the end of her days? That thought scared the hell out of her…

"Guys!" She called for the three auguring men. "Come on, save it. It seems like you've made up your mind…"

Ethan nodded, a sad smile playing on his lips. Zhen hugged him and he hugged her back, careful not to not to put pressure on her still sore ribs:

"Thanks."

That night the four agents went out for a little celebration. Although no one wished for Ethan Hunt, the best agent ever known to MIF, a friend and just a good guy to leave but it seemed like inevitable…

The club was packed with people. Some conversing behind the tables, others dancing on the dance floor. Some drunk, others sober.

Zhan and Declan took a place behind one of the tables while their friends went to get the drinks to one of the bars.

As Declan grew to realize that it was impossible for him to stay close to the slender Asian woman near him and not get the urge to touch the side of her face, caressing her flawless skin, he tried not to stay alone with her. It wasn't really hard because she just recently left the hospital wing. But now…she was so close…

"There you are!" They both turned to see Luther and Ethan with the glasses.

"To Ethan!" Zhen suggested, taking her cocktail.

"To Ethan!" Luther and Declan agreed while the man in the question shrugged, smiling 'thanks'.

"Sorry, miss…" The four of them turned to see an attractive man in his late twenties with dark hair, carefully styled with gel, and emerald eyes bend down to Zhen's level. "Can I have this dance?"

She looked at her friends unsure but reaching the Irishman's cerulean eyes, nodded and left with the man a second later.

"I'll go get another drink." Declan declared after another twenty minutes, he's lost Zhen in the crowd of dancers and wanted to resume the eye contact he's had.

Making his way through the large groups of people he felt some kind of an invincible force tug him into the other direction. He fallowed the call and found himself face to face with the picture he never in his life wanted to see…

In the dark corner of the huge club two figures were kissing passionately as if there was no tomorrow. Something the visitors did occasionally. But it wasn't what they were doing that stunned Declan, it was who the they were…

The eye contact was made and he knew she was looking straight into his eyes when the man she was dancing with only minutes ago started trailing kisses along her collarbone, holding her by the waist.

How could he be such a fool to let himself think that something changed between them after their capture a couple months ago? No…

Zhen knew he was watching. Hell, she started this act only because he was watching. She had to let him think that anything between them was impossible. And she did. Everything that could have happened shattered in front of her eyes.

_Any emotion involved and you're burned. So is the one you're having those relationships with. _

Yes, Luther's words kept playing in her head all through the night and then this voice inside her mind couldn't stop repeating them even afterwards…

And to feel her heart actually break…she thought it was just a figure of speech.


End file.
